Update and a note to my fellow bloggers!

Hi folks.

So…no recipe today.

Now don’t cry.

It’ll be okay.

I know I just gave you a serious post the other day with Remembering…Missing…Mom, but I have to do one more just to fill you all in some life stuff. I know right, boring. But I feel compelled to share. 

First to the readers, I hope you’ve stuck it out the last couple of months through the bad photos and rushed posts. Also the move was a bit rocky there for a day or so. I honestly need to explain and you’ll know why things aren’t up to the usual standards here at the asylum.

Second to my fellow bloggers this is meant to explain my absence from your blogs the last couple of months. I am usually a serial commenter and I used to reply very quickly to your comments. I hope this sheds some light on things and you all will forgive me for being a bad blogging buddy.

Also I don’t want to get too in-depth as it’s personal for another member of the family. So if it seems vague I apologize. I’ll share what I can.

So if you remember back in January me and mini-me got the flu. Well, mini-me stayed sick after having it. We visited the doc which lead to tests, and more tests. She had swollen lymphs that did not respond to medication. So after bloodwork, more bloodwork an ultrasound and some doc visits we are happy to report she is okay. The lumpy as I like to call it is benign. So good news after a stressful couple of months of wondering what was happening. There was talk of biopsies and let me tell you that is not a word any kid or parent wants to hear. I’ll admit I was terrified but kept up a good front for her. I think she was pretty freaked out by it all. Who wouldn’t be? We need to go back in to see what`s next but I think she’s in the clear now and the worry washes away a bit. I did not want to tell people until we knew she was okay. No point in worrying the masses with speculation. So now that she is fine I felt I wanted to tell you all and share it with you. It’s been a rough couple of months and no matter who tells you not to worry you really cannot help yourself. It weighed on my mind every second of every day. Mini-me grew up sick, nothing terminal but pretty serious. We spent about 13 years going back and forth to London, about an hour and a half from home at least a couple of times a year. There was no one here specialized enough to deal with her. So the thought of her being sick, or being sick again was a bit too much to think about.  I went through the day-to-day motions as we do. But lacked the usual giggly, bubbly thing I usually project.

So that is part of the story. The other is money trouble but I won’t bore you with that. Let’s just say things were touch and go for a while but things are looking up. Money stress wears you down. Wears you out.

I’ve also been told I have a heel spur in one foot. So exercise was out of the question. Pain can be a mother. Who knew? I have trouble standing when I get up in the morning and also if I sit too long. I am sure it will pass, it already feels tons better and I’ll admit to a ton of hobbling around and icing it a gazillion times a day. I am hoping to be able to start walking again. I miss the workouts. Need to get my butt in shape. But it’s been on the back burner dealing with the inability to walk.

Okay so add these three things up and what do you get? High blood pressure. Yup, and so it returns. I’d had mine completely under control for some time. Well, not so much any more. I am back on meds and trying to stay “chill”. I know it’s the stress from worrying about mini-me and the constant worry about dough. But now that she is better and hubs is working again I’m sure it’ll be right as rain in no time. I have to say committing to this conference next week was probably not a good idea but I know it will be okay. We’ll just be on a super tight budget while there. You can only do what you can do. When I signed up hubs was supposed to be going back to work immediately. Little did we know it would not pan out or I never would have signed up. But I am fully committed and happy to be going. I am hoping it changes the blog for the better and teaches me to reach for that next level. It’s a sacrifice worth making. I aim to be a good little student and soak in every bit of knowledge I can. And let’s be honest, meeting Jaden from Steamy Kitchen is a dream come true. I may actually pass out. I mean I hope I don’t but be warned folks standing nearby. This chick could hit the ground at a moments notice if Jaden so much as says hello.

So…yup…there you have it. My life in a nutshell.

For the readers I wanted to share this with you as it’s what I do. I am a bit of an open book. Also it helps to explain if I have not been as speedy returning emails or answering queries. My energy was focused elsewhere. While I was able to keep blogging the quality was not great. I’m certain it was noticed. But there are just so many hours in a day and quite honestly when your kid is sick everything else becomes moot. So I am happy I kept blogging but posting was about all the energy I could muster.

For my fellow bloggers I apologize for not visiting like I used to. I am sure many of you were wondering what was wrong with me. Maybe I was getting too big for my britches or had lost interest in your blogs. SO NOT TRUE! I adore you guys and love being part of such an amazing group of people. But at the end of the day I was either off to bed or hanging with el sicko mini-me. I would try to comment on blogs but I found myself just staring at the screen with nothing to say. I still stopped by often but usually just to love ya and leave ya. I could not bring myself to think of a witty, silly comment if my life depended on it most days.

So I hope that clears up the mystery of the missing Lunatic. Also why my photos are more craptastic than usual or my posts seemed disconnected. It was simply me feeling disconnected. I powered through but things suffered. I hope this helps shed some light on why.

I will say I am looking forward to the conference for personal reasons too. This family has been through a lot the last couple of years and I think we need a break. We have not been on vacation in 8 years. B-dude is moving out soon so this is our last hurrah together as a family unit. No spouses or significant others, just us 4 on a mission of fun and silliness. I am sure there will be a ton of immature behaviour and giggling like lunatics while we’re there. It’s how we roll in the Bee household.

So there you go folks. Life stuff. It happens to all of us. So if you are going through some of your own craptastic life stuff don’t feel alone in it. We all have moments where life thumps us upside the head repeatedly. I think it’s meant to teach us things. I won’t claim to know what, but I really do believe life is all about lessons to be learned.  Some of us just seem to have harder heads than others. So we have to get thumped more than once. This chick needs to healthy it up a bit after Disney. I’m not gonna lie, I plan to eat copious amounts of sugar while at Disney, probably massive quantities of fat as well, I will limit the salt with exception of the fish n chips I plan on splurging on. See, hard head, slow learner. My only explanation is it will probably be the only time in my life I go to Disney so it’s no holds barred for three days. If I push your butt out of the way at the dessert table I apologize in advance. But you probably took long to decide and had it coming.

Toodles and smoochies! xx

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Comments

  1. 1
    Mary Kay@JustforCooking says:

    Sweetie, you have NO reason to apologize. Family comes first! This virtual stuff is wonderful but it’s not real. Your family is real, and you have to do what you need to do. I wish I could be at the conference to give you a hug. I got a last minute chance to go as I forgot to sign up. I had already made plans. If you need to talk to someone, just click on my email. I totally understand what it is like to have sick family members, yet we try to go after our own dreams, but reality wins out. Peace and prayers!

    • 2

      You are so incredibly sweet. Thank you so much for that. It really made me feel so much better. I wish you were coming to the conference. Would have been nice to meet you. xx

  2. 3

    So sorry to hear all you’ve been going through! We’ve had some similar issues Chez SGCC too, so I can relate. You’ll have a wonderful time in Orlando and hopefully get in a lot of R & R. I look forward to seeing you there! Take care!

    • 4

      I am so excited to meet you Susan. I silently stalk you a little bit. Oh okay a lot really. I tend to get shy about commenting on the big blogs. Still feeling my way through it. It is going to be so cool meeting people I read. I just hope I remain calm and don’t act like a 5 year old who’s had too much sugar. I mean I’ll probably have had too much sugar but would like to keep that a secret and all. Sorry you are having “life stuff” too. Life is never dull. Look forward to meeting you. Coming up so fast!

  3. 5

    Hey you have nothing to apologize to us fellow bloggers as far as I am concerned. I think you have been great with all you have been dealing with behind the scenes. I am so happy that mini-me is okay. I have had those kind of scares myself in the past and I know how utterly nerve wracking it can be and I can’t even imagine if it was one of my children. Have a great time at the conference.. you deserve a little fun! Take care and have a great weekend!! ~ Ramona

    • 6

      Thanks so much Ramona. These scares in life are always hard on us. Kids just magnify it. I am so relieved now that we know it’s benign. Takes a huge load off. Thanks so much for your kind words. It means the world to me. xx

  4. 7

    So relieved to hear that things are looking up. Jumping up and down that passports came and that you will soon be on your way here. It’s been in the 80s so plan for a tan.

    And I have NO idea why you’d need to get to the dessert line with 10 dozen turtle buns of your own. Really, Kim, lets have a little lesson on sharing.

    • 8

      I could not believe they were sitting there and no one notified us. Thank goodness they didn’t return them. We’d have been in a pickle. I keep thinking I should go pretan this week. I tend to burn and peel if I don’t do it carefully. I should have started a week ago but tanning costs $$$. I can just see me getting sun-burned on Friday and not being able to go to the thing Saturday. The life of those with Irish skin. Lol.

      Oh man there is always room for dessert. And sharing is for wussies.

  5. 9

    WHEW! I’m SO glad you got good news!!! Your blogger friends adore you…so don’t you worry one bit about being a bit behind in commenting. I can’t wait to hear all about your trip…no passing out allowed ;) xx

    • 10

      Thanks so much Liz. I am appreciative of how supportive you’ve been. I am so lucky to have such great friends. I plan on having a blast and making a complete fool of myself as much as possible.

  6. 11

    Dear KIm, the best news is that things are getting better: mini-you, your husband, and I am sure you will get that blood pressure under control again. Thank you for opening up. Have a very good time at Disney, you deserved a break! I will be patiently waiting for your posts when you come back. You rock! :)

    • 12

      Aw thanks Marina. I am so looking forward to the trip. It’s going to be so much fun. I think I might post some daily adventures each day. We’ll see how time goes. Thanks so much for your support. You are so amazing. xx

  7. 13

    Kim, I’m glad things are looking up for you. With “real” problems, blogging is usually the first thing that’s pushed aside. I never talk about it on my blog for security reasons (and it’s just not that kind of blog) but I know this all too well. But I also found that blogging was a great way to take my mind off of what was wrong. Blogging and reading others blogs was a great distraction when things are tough. I’m sure it was tough having a chronically sick child. When my daughter broke her wrist last week, I felt so bad. I’m sure dealing with sickness all the time would be really difficult. You seem like such a strong person and I truely believe what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger. Hang in there and best wishes!!!

    • 14

      You are so sweet Alyssa, thank you so much. You poor little girl, how awful. B-dude broke his leg once and it is awful for them to go through that. I think blogging this past year has kept me sane. It’s always that fine line of what to talk about and what to keep private. I try to keep the kids names off it. There is certainly a risk in being too open for sure.

  8. 15

    Yep, it happens to all of us.. And there good periods, then bad ones.. I just want to wish you good luck and our love is with you no matter what :)

  9. 17

    Dearest Kim, I think, your fellow bloggers will understand about it, I’m really understand, those issue surely exhaust your focus and energy. your daughters needs and absolutely deserve your attention than ours, if you filling hard to passing through your privacy problems with blogging thing, than take your time. you’re wonderful cooker and blogger, I’m sure your fellow will still appreciate you though you’re absent for commenting their blog. and btw your recently photograph still looks good! I think there’s nothing to worry. keep standing up, keep strong and I love you Kim

    cheers

    • 18

      You are so sweet Tya. I am very touched by the support. Life can be a bit unkind at times but people always amaze me with their kindness through it. Thanks so much for caring and be so supportive. It means so much to me. Love right back at ya!

  10. 19
    Dionne Baldwin says:

    Oh my you’ve been under a lot of pressure. And no I’m not trying to be funny. I just want this next few weeks to bring good news better health and a start of something much better for you and your family.

    • 20

      Thank you so much Dionne. I am really hoping things turn around. Would be nice to have some financially stability for a change. And I’m not gonna lie, I really do miss shopping. It’s been years! lol

  11. 21

    My friend you have no reason to apologise or even dare say you are a bad blogging buddy! After everything you have been going through, it is more than understandable – you are strong, committed and one of the most wonderful bloggers I know – do not say sorry just stay strong for your beautiful family. Have a ball at Disneyland my friend and come back as Cinderella ;)

    Cheers and best of luck!
    Choc Chip Uru

    P.S If those were your çraptastic’ photos, then I am seriously going to start laughing! They looked totally normal and pretty to me :)

    • 22

      Aw you are such a sweetheart. I am so glad I met you. I see you taking the world by storm one day my friend. Your talent and kindness are limitless.

      My styling needs help as does my lighting. But it’s a process. There is definitely a learning curve for me.

  12. 23

    Life can definitely get in the way some times and it sucks. I hope things continue to look up for you from here on out. I will keep reading regardless of the craptastic photos although you could have fooled me.

    • 24

      So true. Reality bites. The movie was right. I should have paid more attention. Lol. I appreciate the support so much. xx

  13. 25

    How scary! I’m glad K is ok; I can’t even Imagine how scared the two of you were. But I’m happy it turned out to be benign. Poor kiddo never gets a break, does she?

    I hear you on the money stress. We have to move soon and we have no place lined up and while we can afford the one months rent I am not sure how we are going to afford the equivalent security deposit or last months rent too ( the latter only applies if we move to Massachusetts). And all I really want to do is buy a house. :(

    Have an amazing time in sunny and warm Florida!!! I am super jealous.

    • 26

      Hey Miss Amy. Oh man it was so hard to go through and so hard to keep a lid on. But mini-me was against some people knowing about it so I had to respect her wishes. She really never does get a break. I swear she’s maybe had two normal, no illness years out of her entire 18 years. I think she was just like seriously leave me alone, I’ve had enough. She’s a trouper though. So glad she’s okay. I would not have been able to take it.

      Oh Amy I wish one of us could win the lotto and help the other out. We’ve talked about leasing out the horse or god forbid, selling her but we’re trying to hang on as long as we can. I know it’ll turn around for us and for you. You know we waited till our 40’s to buy our first home. So have faith it’ll happen. I know it will.

      Thanks. I am so lucky to have this opportunity. There is no way I could go otherwise. It will be our last hurrah as a family. Should prove to be quite an adventure.

  14. 27

    There has been some rocky places in your life recently but I am glad to see that things are looking up. While we all love blogging, sometimes life has a way of taking over, so it is understandable. You have a good attitude that the not so great happenings in our life are meant to teach us something. I wish you well and have a blast in Orlando!

    • 28

      Aw thanks Tina. I just have to believe it’s meant to be this way or I’d go crazy. I used to let the stuff drag me down but I gave up too many years to that lifestyle of worrying and be debbie downer. I won’t ever let myself go there again. My life, my rules. It’s the only way I know how to cope. I am so looking forward to Orlando. It’s going to be so nice to get away and regroup.

  15. 29

    No apology necessary! Life sometimes sucks up so much that something has to give. I am totally with you. If I haven’t posted in awhile or hit sister-blogs it is because family comes ahead of my blog. Hopefully things will be on the upswing for you and yours!

    • 30

      Thanks so much Deborah. I always say family first, blog second. It’s a lot of work to maintain both. I am sure things will get better soon. Just knowing mini-me is okay makes everything okay in my book.

  16. 31

    Been there, done that, didn’t get a tee-shirt. I soooo hear your pain…long-term sick kids, lost jobs, new jobs, awful jobs, high blood pressure (but no heel spurs!). Some days it was hard to get out of bed, much less think of something clever to say after blowing up the kitchen, photographing the results, and wondering why you were making the effort. I love your blog – when you are here, you are here. Noticed there were less field trips…but you maintained a fairly good cover. Hope the sun shines on you and all is well in your world very soon. Enjoy the Disney experience!

    • 32

      Aw thanks so much Debbi. You are so kind. Am hoping the field trips return soon. With spring will come farmers markets. Can’t wait for the return of Farm Fresh Fridays. Sorry for you own troubles. Life does not play fair most days. I just have to force myself to look at the positive and not the negative. It’ll turn around. Then this will be a distant memory. I can’t wait to share the trip with everyone. Should be tons of fun.

  17. 33

    You don’t need to apologize to us! I’m so glad mini-me is okay! Family always comes first! I hope you guys have a great time in Orlando!

    • 34

      Thanks so much Stephanie. You are a true and great friend. I am planning to go Disney crazy. Look forward to sharing the experience with everyone.

  18. 35

    Kinda the same thing over here. I was having some issues with my son and it just changes everything for awhile. Money stuff too with the hubs calling in to be with him instead of getting overtime and a few emergency room visits, you get down a few hundred dollars VERY quickly. I feel you pain…and your eagerness to keep going. Best of luck!

    • 36

      I am so sorry about your son. I hope he is okay. If you ever want to vent hit my email. Mini-me grew up chronically ill so we’ve spent most of her life dealing with this kind of thing. I can empathize in a big way. Having a child sick puts everything else into perspective. But money issues can make that whole thing far more stressful than it should ever be. Wishing you well. Lots of positive thoughts coming your way.

  19. 37

    Oh, so sorry for what you all have and had gone through. I bet Disney and FBF would change all that, eh? :)

    Hugs.

    • 38

      Thanks Kiran. I think next week is just what we all need to decompress a bit. It was one of those opportunities I could not pass up. I am hoping I learn so much. I feel like I am missing some basic blogging knowledge. Hoping to change that.

  20. 39

    Take a deep breath, then dive in and enjoy Orlando. You and the family have definitely earned this break. Life is a roller coaster for all of us. You’ve been in one of the lows for a bit and now seem to be working your way back up. We’ll be there waiting pushing you up that hill, GF. Blogging is great fun and we all make many close friends this way, BUT your family and everyday life are the most important parts of your world and will (and should) always come first. Never apologize for loving and caring for your family first.

    • 40

      You are so kind. I love the way you put that. Thanks so much for your kind words. It’s so nice to know people care and we are not alone in our “life stuff”.

  21. 41

    I’m so sorry you had to go through all of that but so glad to hear everything is going better! And so glad Mini-me is all better! Definitely no need for apologies, life can get in the way sometimes and family is much more important!:)

  22. 43

    Kim, hang in there. Times of struggle make us appreciate the walks through the valleys so much more! I’ve just started following you, but look forward to reading you regularly. Everyone in the blogging world is here to support you and we all realize that family is first and foremost. Take care of yourself, your family and THEN there whenever you are ready we will welcome you with open arms! <3

    • 44

      Thanks so much Lynne. Glad you found me and stopped to comment. It is very sweet of you. Look forward to getting to know you better. xx

  23. 45

    Oh Kim I’m so sorry to hear about what a rough few months you’ve had! I am really happy to hear that mini you is ok – what a nerve wracking experience! I hope you have an amazing time at the conference and that your foot and blood pressure get better soon!! xoxo

    • 46

      Thanks Katherine. I am sure I am on the road to recovery. It means so much to me to have your support. You are an amazing friend. xx

  24. 47

    I’m so sorry and so surprised to hear that you’ve been going through so much Kim! You are such a positive and supportive blogging friend. You have absolutely nothing to apologize for. I know how scary it is to have one of your kids ill. We went through something similar with Boy #4 and it was the scariest thing I’ve ever experienced. I’m so glad to hear that she is fine and you can sigh that HUGE sigh of relief. Now it’s time to take care of yourself and I can’t think of a better way to to do that than this trip next week. Attending the conference will be so good for you and such a nice break from the day to day. Have a great time and I can’t wait to follow the Tweets and hear all about it here when you get back!

  25. 48

    I agree with my fellow bloggers that there’s nothing to apologize for. Family comes first and so should your health. You need to take care of yourself which will allow you to take care of the others. Thank you for sharing it with us and I’m sorry I won’t get to see you in Florida. I think it would be a hoot to meet you in person. But you enjoy the trip and don’t stress about whether or not you should have booked it. Have fun, eat lots of yummy things and come visit my blog again when you return.

  26. 49

    See, and I still thought you were a super amazing blogger – now I am dying to see what you have up your sleeve when life’s a little less hectic and stressful! Sending warm happy thoughts to you and yours, especially mini-me (mini-you, I guess that would be, to me :))

  27. 50

    I’m sorta new here and I hardly know you. Bad times are bad and we all hate them but funny they’re so much a real parcel in life. But yipee things on the fairer front for you…let’s hope it only gets better!

    God bless

    Peace

    • 51

      Okay so for the record this is usually a really happy fun place. You may have picked the wrong day to start reading. Lol. Hopefully I didn’t scare you off.

  28. 52

    I knew a little, and imagined some of the rest with mini-me. I am sorry about all the other things on top, but glad things seem to be looking up a little. *hugs* You know we love you and are here for you <3 If anyone has the spirit and personality to carry on it's you. Hang in there!

  29. 53

    So glad to hear things are starting to look up. Sounds like your life is crazy but I’m glad to hear that your daughter is on the mend and I know you will enjoy FBF! Happy thoughts and well wishes to you and your family Kim!

  30. 55

    Hey BBFF, glad to hear things are going uphill for a change! Enjoy your vacation and conference. I may be just a bit jealous :)

    • 56

      Thanks so much BBFF! I wish you were going to be there too. We must meet. Life will turn around, I am sure of it.

  31. 57

    I am so happy to hear your daughter is OK, wow how scary that must have been. But sorry to hear you are having problems as well…hope you are able to relax a bit and get things settled down :)

    • 58

      Thanks so much. I am so relieved she is okay. I’ll be okay too. I just need to take the reins and steer my life back to a healthier course.

  32. 59

    Goodness, gracious. You’ve had a lot going on! I don’t think you need to apologize whatsoever. Life happens, it’s crazy, and we all understand. We just want you to be happy and healthy. I can’t believe you’ve kept up with your blog as well as you have! Here’s to things getting better (and back to normal).

  33. 61

    Kim take care of your family and come back to us when you feel like you are ready! We will be waiting!!! And please don’t apologies because you are loved by all of us and we support you!!! Take care honey…virtual hugs to you and your baby!!!!

  34. 62

    Hugs, Kim. I know full-well what it’s like when life gets in the way of blogging…but we are always here for you. And I can imagine the worries about money and the health of your child keep you from the blog!

  35. 63

    Hope things start looking up for you. I feel your pain on the heel spur, they are no fun, especially when you teach fitness classes for a living. I’ve been sidelined many days because of them. Sending you hugs!

  36. 64

    So glad to hear that mini-me is ok! I can just imagine your worry the last few months. I would have been beside myself. I hope you have a fantastic time on your hurrah! Many hugs to you all. :)

  37. 65

    I’m SOOOOO glad her tests came back negative! That is a huge sigh of relief for you all! Now you can take a deep breath and get everything else back on track. And we’ll all be waiting here with open arms when you do! Hugs to you friend!

  38. 66

    Sweetie you don’t have to apologize to anyone my dear. You are a brave girl and I am so sure things will getter better soon. I am also glad mini-me is feeling better….
    You take good care of yourself too, somehow we women push ourselves way behind when caring for things and others…
    We all are here always, praying for you and waiting for you, take my words on this..
    HUGS!!!

  39. 67

    I’ve read and heard that stress is actually a much more serious health concern than weight or eating habits or illness — it just wears you out and makes you vulnerable to everything.

  40. 68

    You may feel that you haven’t been presenting your usual self to us readers but I can’t wait for you to brighten my day. I have only been visiting for approx the last 4 weeks and always leave with a smile. I wish all of your family best wishes and some less stressful times.

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