"Today's event is being hosted by myself, and Jen of Juanita's Cocina. We teamed up with our blogger friends to help raise awareness and support for Cancer and Hospice today in memory of my dad. We encourage everyone to read the posts and share your own experiences with cancer. We also would like to encourage everyone to donate to the Canadian Cancer Society, the American Cancer Society and also to the Canadian Hospice Palliative Care Association. Hospice was a key element during my dad's battle with cancer. They made it possible for me to care for him at home. So please show your support and donate if you can. You can also contact your local Hospice and donate directly to them if you wish. A little goes a long way! "
I am so overwhelmed by my blogging friends today. I put out word I wanted to do a group event to help raise awareness for those battling cancer, and also wanted to encourage folks to donate to hospice. My friends showed up and offered their support. Thank you to everyone who posted for this event. I asked a lot of them, posting on Fathers Day even though it was not a Fathers Day event. I am so stunned at the kindness and generosity of these people involved.
We're holding this on Fathers Day in memory of my Dad who passed away from lung cancer in 2007. I asked everyone else to write about someone in their life who has meant the world to them and about their experiences with cancer. It affects so many of us. If you happen to be untouched by it you are one of the extremely rare, and lucky ones. Most of us know someone in our lives battling this terrible disease. It touches us all in some way, at some time. So I wanted to have everyone share their stories with their readers and encourage those readers to share their own stories. My thought is it helps ease the pain a bit, and also helps people know they are never alone. We all fight this battle in some way and we need to support each other through it.
Before I share my story I'd like to thank Jen of Juanita's Cocina for being my wing woman today. Jen graciously helps me plan these events and without her I'd be lost. She is such a supportive and kind friend, I'm lucky to have her in my life.
I would also like to thank KitchenAid Canada for graciously offering up a KitchenAid Stand Mixer & Ice Cream Attachment for today's event. You can find details about the giveaway at the bottom of this post. Thank you to Cortney and Laura for all your hard work. You ladies are amazing.
Now for the hard part. Opening up. It's never easy is it? Yet it's often so cathartic to do. At least for me. Here goes.
I had a very complicated relationship with my Dad. He was not an easy man to get along with. He tended to play favourites and let's just say I did not quite make his list. Dad was a hard man, he never showed affection or emotion. Yet he was there for you when the chips were down. Without question, without fail. So when he called me one day to ask me for my help I didn't hesitate to say yes. Not that Dad would have let me, I think his exact words were "I need your help and no is not an option here". I picked him up for an appointment, he refused to let me stay or tell me much about what was going on. He made light of it and had me come back for him later. I was not happy about this arrangement but arguing with my Dad was pointless. Not much time passed before I got another call. This time I would not take no for an answer and went in with him. Imagine my surprise when words like "draining your lungs again" and "possible cancer" were being tossed about. I took my Dad out for a bite to eat and let him know this keeping secrets stuff was unacceptable. That I wanted to help and would do whatever he needed, whenever he needed it. Little did I know that would become my life for the next 9 months.
I took care of my Dad through his illness. He wanted to be at home and other than a 2 week stint in the hospital after the chemo almost killed him, I managed to keep him home until the end. During the last 3 months we enlisted the help of one of his sisters and without her I would have never seen my own family during this time. Dad needed so much care, and after 6 months I was burnt out and in need of some help. My Aunt Cathie came to the rescue and stayed with him so I could do all the things that go along with cancer. Picking up medication, literature, food, spending lots of time on the phone arranging nurses to come in once a day to check on him, making arrangements for people to come in with air tanks, people with bars for the bathroom and stairs, people who could help bathe him so we didn't have to. We enlisted hospice to help and without them I would have been lost. They helped teach me what to expect as the days passed and time became short. Since I was his primary caregiver and dealt with all the meds I needed to learn how to give shots, how to properly dose morphine, all kinds of things I never in my life imagined I'd be doing. Yet it was my Dad so I just did it without question. It's what you do when someone you love is sick.
I won't lie to you, this journey with my Dad was hard on him, me and my family. He was harsh, and he took his anger out on the people around him. For some reason he seemed to pick on Mini-me when she came with me to the house. She is as stoic as my father and myself, but this man could reduce her to tears in moments. We all just tolerated it because he was sick, and who yells at someone who is terminally ill. He continued to lash out at us all and only in the final weeks did he finally admit it was because he was scared. We had a big blow up a couple of weeks before he passed away. I still am shocked I yelled at him that day but I had reached my limit. He really laid into my aunt this particular day and I just reached my boiling point. I told him it was unacceptable to treat her that way. He raged, and told me off. I shot back that he was lucky we were all there given how he was treating us. My aunt had dropped everything to come help, no questions asked. This was the wrong thing to say. It escalated into a war of words until I decided enough was enough and left for the day. He complained to my aunt and I was sure he hated me for telling him how I felt about what he was doing. The next day I went to the house as I always did, thinking he would not speak to me ever again. To my surprise he apologized to me. I think this was the only time in my life my Dad had ever apologized and admitted he was wrong. He told me he was scared to die. That he was in so much pain, and he didn't know how to cope. He told me how he felt for the first time in his life, we both cried and talked for what seemed like forever. Openly, kindly and uninhibited. He was so scared of what was coming but was trying to be strong for all of us. He did not realize he was hurting those who wanted to help. From that moment forth my Dad was kind to everyone who came to the house. In his final weeks he became forthcoming and talked about his feelings. It was a rare thing only a few of us were lucky enough to experience. Dad being vulnerable, something he had always perceived as weakness. It was like his final gift to us.
I feel so blessed to have gotten to know my Dad so well through this process. We spent 9 months together, day in and day out. You get to know someone pretty well through something like that. He told me stories about his childhood, his early years with my Mom, told memories of us kids and then memories of the grand-kids. I had the distinct pleasure of listening to him and getting to know him like I never had before. I can look back now and know that "caregiver syndrome" was the reason he was so mean to me all the time. It's hard on a person like my Dad to rely on someone else for everything in their life. He was so fiercely independent and then his life flipped upside down, and he had to rely on his daughter to do things for him he never imagined I would have to do. So he became bitter and resentful. Most people would. It took some counselling at the Cancer Clinic for me to really understand what was happening and why.
The best thing I took away from my counselling sessions was her telling me "it's his journey, you're just a passenger. He's the driver and he has to choose his own path. You're just along for the ride. You either accept his path or you get out of the car." This advice was life-changing for me. It made me step back and always see things from his perspective. Which made caring for him so much easier most days.
When I think back and remember my Dad lots of things come to mind. His weird sense of humour, how he always smelled of pipe tobacco, his flannel shirts (one of which I still own) and his love of food. Since I was the only lady in the house for most special occasions it seemed to fall to me to make most dinners. Dad loved my lasagna, apple pie, and black forest cake. He would ask me to make roast chicken, and my stuffing was something he practically begged for. There are so many recipes that remind me of my Dad. But ice cream, well, ice cream was his favourite.
Ice cream was something my Dad loved beyond belief. Not just a little bit. But a whole big bunch. He ate very healthy day to day, most of his meals being balanced and veggie heavy. He took really good care of himself, even as a bachelor in his later years. His one weakness was ice cream. He loved it. He could not resist it. We used to tease him about his ice cream belly. He was tall and thin, barring a little bump we dubbed his "ice cream belly". Dad would eat ice cream as much as possible. Yet he liked it simple. My Dad was not into fancy flavours or ice cream that was overloaded with extras. He liked it pure and simple. One of his favourite options was high quality vanilla ice cream that he would top with strawberry jam. He just loved it that way. Simple and classic.
So today I made you a creamy, simple vanilla bean ice cream with only 3 ingredients. I know right. Sounds too good to be true. But it's not. I am not someone who makes much home-made jam so I turned to a tried and true way to serve up strawberries in our family. Again, it's simple and classic. Only 3 ingredients, and quite honestly you could get away with 2 ingredients if you wanted to for this one. It's just a simple macerated berry recipe. It makes me super happy to share this recipe with you in honour of my Dad. He would have wanted a spoon for each hand for this one!
Vanilla Bean Ice Cream with Home-made Strawberry Topping & KitchenAid Stand Mixer Giveaway #recipesfromtheheart
Ingredients
For the Vanilla Bean Ice Cream:
- 3 cups heavy cream
- 2 vanilla beans
- 1 cup vanilla sugar regular sugar is okay too
For the Macerated Strawberries:
- 1 to 1 ½ cups fresh strawberries washed and hulled
- Juice of 1 orange
- 1 to 2 tablespoons vanilla sugar regular sugar is fine
Instructions
For the Vanilla Bean Ice Cream:
- Pour the heavy cream into a medium sized saucepan. Place over medium low heat.
- Take your vanilla beans and slice them down the middle all the way down the length. Spread it apart as best you can and scrape the inside with a knife. Take all that yummy goodness and put it in the saucepan of heavy cream. Repeat with second bean, and toss both the beans in the saucepan too.
- Now let the cream heat up until it starts to bubble all around the outside edge of the saucepan. Do not let it reach full boil. You just want that slight bubbling.
- Take it off the heat and drop in the sugar. Stir until it dissolves.
- Now allow it to cool down.
- Place in the fridge overnight, (you can do it for a shorter time but the vanilla taste will be more subtle) covered.
- Remove from the fridge and pull out the large pieces of beans.
- Pop in your ice cream maker and allow to spin for 10 to 15 minutes. This is a steeped cream base so it will not double up like some ice cream bases. It yields less but is far more creamy.
- Pop the ice cream attachment in the freezer overnight, you could do it for less time but it will not be as firm.
- Remove from freezer when ready to serve.
- Since this is a creamy base it tends to melt quicker so keep that in mind when scooping.
- Serve solo or with berries.
For the Strawberry Topping:
- Hull and slice up your strawberries into a medium sized bowl, or container.
- Cut an orange in half. Juice it over top of the strawberries. Discard the orange.
- Cover and place in the fridge for about 2 to 4 hours. The longer they sit the softer they become.
- Remove and sprinkle some sugar over top.
Putting it all together:
- Scoop out some ice cream, working quickly.
- Scoop some strawberries over top.
- You can top with anything else you like, I threw pistachios over top of mine, but you could use walnuts or almonds or chocolate pieces.
- Serve with a big old simple and classic smile! For Dad!
Notes
Nutrition
Make sure you stop by all my friends websites as they share stories, recipes and a cute knitting project with you! We have the pleasure of having a dear friend of mine named Amy with us for this event. She is the only non-food blogger participating today but she has such a personal story to tell about her dad's recent battle with cancer. So please welcome her along with all my foodie friends. Stop by and say hello to all these very special people:
Chili Verde by Juanita's Cocina
S'Mores Brownies in Jars by That Skinny Chick Can Bake
Dark Chocolate and Orange Muffins by The Dutch Baker's Daughter
Boston Cream Pie by Pass The Sushi
My Fathers Day Recipe Round Up by Curry and Comfort
Tropical Smoothie by Dinners, Dishes and Desserts
Mini Gugelhupf by Masala Herb
Sauteed Strawberry and Sugarsnap Salad by Cook The Story
Cranberry Cashew Breakfast Muffins by In Fine Balance
Arugula Salad with Sundried Tomatoes and Mushrooms by Crazy Foodie Stunts
Spicy Beef Sliders by Katie's Cucina
Thai Red Curry Soup by Damn Delicious
Suman (Sweet Rice and Banana Leaves) by Culinary Adventures with Camilla
Fresh Vegetable Salad by White Lights on Wednesday
Peanut Butter Cup Ice Cream Sundae by The Girl in the Little Red Kitchen
Cinnamon Chip Cookie Butter Bars by The Messy Baker
Berry/Cherry Fro-Yo Ice Cream by Cookistry
Honey Beer Bread by Hungry Couple
Cinnamon-Chocolate Chip Pancakes by The Spiffy Cookie
Chocolate Cherry Granola Bars by Sweet Remedy
Cookies and Cream Brownies by Cooking in Stilettos
Blueberry Lemon Cake by Roxana's Home Baking
Angel Cake by Ninja Baking
and
Knit (or crocheted) Grey Brain Cancer Mustache Pin by Knit, Purl, Damn!
Thank you to all the participants for their hard work and patience.
For all my readers, thanks for your patience over this very lengthy post. And for you constant support whether I share recipes or really personal stories with you. You always show me kindness and generosity, thank you for that. It means the world to me.
Now on with the giveaway!
Visit Facebook.com/
Disclaimer: We are proud to have KitchenAid on board to give away the grand prize for this event. No blogger involved received anything from KitchenAid or any compensation of any kind. It was our goal not to profit in any way since the focus is on raising money for charity. The bonus prizes are being supplied by me personally. It's my way to give back to my readers for their support and generosity. Thanks.
Toodles and smoochies! xx
Teresa
I've never made ice cream so I'd probably just do a simple ice cream first
Kim Beaulieu
Vanilla bean would be perfect for a first timer. Or a nice simple chocolate. Good luck Teresa.
Sandie
I would make some amazing Monster cookies to share at work. Peanut butter, oatmeal, chocolate chips, nuts, and anything else you want to throw in there. Yummy. Thanks for sharing about your Dad.
Kim Beaulieu
Love Monster cookies. That sounds perfect. Good luck and thanks for visiting today. xx
Alice @HipFoodieMom
Hi Kim,
first off, I am kicking myself for not getting my act together and joining in on this because of this truly WONDERFUL cause. Kim, thank you so much for sharing such a touching, heart breaking story about your father. I read every single word. It was just beautiful. Thank you for opening up. I'm sure this post was very hard to write and share. So, again from the bottom of my heart, thank you for sharing. and I hope you all are able to raise awareness and support for Cancer and Hospice. What a wonderful way to bring people together. Love, Alice
Kim Beaulieu
Hey Alice:
Awe you are so sweet. I wish you had joined us but there's always next time. We'd love to have you join us in the future.
I was so worried it was way too long but I didn't know how to tell it short and sweet. So happy you made it through. These are always hard to write but for me it's so worthwhile, I love that it brings people out to tell their own stories. It's such a relief to know we're not alone.
Thanks for taking the time to visit and read, and to leave such a kind comment. Comments like this make pouring my heart out worthwhile.
xx
MaryB
I would make coconut ice cream for Hula pie!
Kim Beaulieu
Okay seriously Mary, I think I may love you now.
Kayle (The Cooking Actress)
Kim, thank you so much for sharing your story and creating this event for others to share their stories. You're so incredible and I am so lucky to know you.
Also, you make some awesome ice cream lady. Vanilla bean ice cream is pure, classic, unadulterated bliss.
Kim Beaulieu
Awe thanks so much Kayle. I am so thrilled people are responding and sharing their stories. It makes my heart happy that people are willing to share their stories. I am also thankful to know you and count you as a friend.
Thanks, I love making ice cream. Maybe way too much.
Janetta Dobler
Wishing you many blessings on this Father's Day!
Kim Beaulieu
Thanks so much Janetta!
Janetta Dobler
Wishing you many blessings on this Father's Day! If I win, I would make mint chocolate chip or cherry vanilla ice cream!
Kim Beaulieu
Great choice. I love both of those ice cream.
Suzanne
I would break in that ice cream attachment right away and make a batch if chocolate peanut butter ice cream!
So glad to read your story about you and your dad. I, too, had a difficult relationship with my dad. I still find it hard to think about happy times with him, because of all the bad stuff that happened, even on a day like today when everyone is celebrating fathers.
Kim Beaulieu
Now that sounds perfect. I love chocolate and peanut butter. It's sheer perfection.
I am the same way Suzanne. There was so much negative it made it hard to focus on the positive. If you ever need to talk email me. I had such a hard time coming to grips with my past. My relationship with my dad has been the biggest hurdle for me and I'm still learning lessons from it all today. Life is messy man. Not all of us have picture perfect upbringings. It's good to know we're not alone. xx
Annamaria @ Bakewell Junction
I would make vanilla ice cream.
It's always so difficult when family members are taken by cancer.
Annamaria
Kim Beaulieu
Thanks so much Annamaria. xx
Lily Sheng
I'd make pizza, bread, or anything doughy!!
Kim Beaulieu
This mixer would be perfect for that.
Tricia
You must never regret a moment of the time spent with your Dad....even the words. You stepped up to a harsh time in your Dad's life. Bless you.
Kim Beaulieu
I never do. It was worth all the heck we went through to come out the other side and just forgive and move on. Not easy but necessary in life I think. Thanks so much Tricia.
Javelin Warrior
A very touching tribute to your father, Kim... It was actually difficult for me to read - but at the same time, I couldn't not keep reading. Thank you so much sharing and what a wonderful recipe in his memory... Happy Father's Day to your dad and all others...
Kim Beaulieu
Thanks so much, I know it can be a bit overwhelming to read. I wrote about his last moments last year and I know it rocked some people pretty hard. Thanks for visiting and commenting. xx
Stephanie Ann
I would make chocolate chip cookies!
Kim Beaulieu
Sheer perfection!
Choc Chip Uru
This story was heartbreakingly beautiful my friend. Your father sounds like an incredible man, this tribute it definitely a testimont to that. 🙂
Thank you for sharing.
Hugs
Uru
Kim Beaulieu
Thanks so much Uru. xx
Carla
You're going to make me cry. I am really close with my dad, especially with my mom being sick most of my life and he has to be Mr. Mom most of the time (long story). All I could think was what if that happens to my dad? Because he is still and healthy, but we all know life happens.
Anyway, sorry I couldn't participate on such an important day. I had to get my things in order, you know? My dad loves ice cream (and cake and cookies and steak and ribs and cheesecake and....) and he would be happy to know you put it in a jar so that means I can deliver ice cream to him. Crap, see what you started? An ice cream delivery service.
<3
Kim Beaulieu
Awe Carla, I did not want to make you cry or scare the crap out of you. But it is true that life is short. You have to just be in the moment whenever you can. But on the flip side never live in fear of chasing your own dreams lady. It's a balance like all things in life I think.
I wish you could have joined us but I'm just happy you visited. We'll do more things like this in the future and you are always welcome to join us.
Ha, I love the idea of ice cream in mason jars. I'm such a jar freak. xx
Carla
Crap I didn't answer the giveaway question. Since I already have a stand mixer, I'd probably give it to my parents. Mainly because every time I try baking there, I get frustrated with their stupid hand mixer. Seriously, it has one speed - high, high, and super high. Try making frosting and have powdered sugar fly everywhere 😀
Kim Beaulieu
You are too hilarious. I also think you're super sweet that you'd give it away. That's super generous and I'm sure your folks would love it. Plus you get the added bonus of being able to use while visiting. My dad did not have a hand mixer for a few years and wanted me to make everything with one of those old stick immersion blenders. But before they worked and were awesome. It was awful, lol.
Joann
Your story about you & your father's relationship was so touching. Definitely a tear jerker
Kim Beaulieu
Thanks so much Joann.
The Ninja Baker
Thank you for your honesty, Kim B. Life isn't as simple and pretty as your vanilla bean ice cream with sauce. (Of course, I clipped the recipe!) And food can serve as beautiful expressions of love. But there is nothing like a parent with whom you've had difficulty confessing their fear, telling you they are sorry...And all the interactions in between, such as the Mother Lion in your golden heart laying down boundaries when it comes to Mini Me and your aunt. Bravo, Kim! Your story is inspirational. I applaud you for telling the truth and thank you for holding this very important event.
Kim Beaulieu
Thank you so much Kim. You are so kind and I just love the way you put all that. It really made me think back and ponder my protective nature. It was always one thing for him to treat me badly, but when he did it to others it drove me mad with frustration.
Thank you so much for joining us. It's been a pleasure and honour to have you with us. xx
Stacey Bentley
Cookies and Cream Ice Cream!
Kim Beaulieu
Perfection!
Peter Maguire
I'm thinking I would make some sorbet using dry ice instead of freezing my solution.
Kim Beaulieu
Cripes Peter, you're my new hero. That's epic stuff there. I'm impressed.