"Today's event is being hosted by myself, and Jen of Juanita's Cocina. We teamed up with our blogger friends to help raise awareness and support for Cancer and Hospice today in memory of my dad. We encourage everyone to read the posts and share your own experiences with cancer. We also would like to encourage everyone to donate to the Canadian Cancer Society, the American Cancer Society and also to the Canadian Hospice Palliative Care Association. Hospice was a key element during my dad's battle with cancer. They made it possible for me to care for him at home. So please show your support and donate if you can. You can also contact your local Hospice and donate directly to them if you wish. A little goes a long way! "
I am so overwhelmed by my blogging friends today. I put out word I wanted to do a group event to help raise awareness for those battling cancer, and also wanted to encourage folks to donate to hospice. My friends showed up and offered their support. Thank you to everyone who posted for this event. I asked a lot of them, posting on Fathers Day even though it was not a Fathers Day event. I am so stunned at the kindness and generosity of these people involved.
We're holding this on Fathers Day in memory of my Dad who passed away from lung cancer in 2007. I asked everyone else to write about someone in their life who has meant the world to them and about their experiences with cancer. It affects so many of us. If you happen to be untouched by it you are one of the extremely rare, and lucky ones. Most of us know someone in our lives battling this terrible disease. It touches us all in some way, at some time. So I wanted to have everyone share their stories with their readers and encourage those readers to share their own stories. My thought is it helps ease the pain a bit, and also helps people know they are never alone. We all fight this battle in some way and we need to support each other through it.
Before I share my story I'd like to thank Jen of Juanita's Cocina for being my wing woman today. Jen graciously helps me plan these events and without her I'd be lost. She is such a supportive and kind friend, I'm lucky to have her in my life.
I would also like to thank KitchenAid Canada for graciously offering up a KitchenAid Stand Mixer & Ice Cream Attachment for today's event. You can find details about the giveaway at the bottom of this post. Thank you to Cortney and Laura for all your hard work. You ladies are amazing.
Now for the hard part. Opening up. It's never easy is it? Yet it's often so cathartic to do. At least for me. Here goes.
I had a very complicated relationship with my Dad. He was not an easy man to get along with. He tended to play favourites and let's just say I did not quite make his list. Dad was a hard man, he never showed affection or emotion. Yet he was there for you when the chips were down. Without question, without fail. So when he called me one day to ask me for my help I didn't hesitate to say yes. Not that Dad would have let me, I think his exact words were "I need your help and no is not an option here". I picked him up for an appointment, he refused to let me stay or tell me much about what was going on. He made light of it and had me come back for him later. I was not happy about this arrangement but arguing with my Dad was pointless. Not much time passed before I got another call. This time I would not take no for an answer and went in with him. Imagine my surprise when words like "draining your lungs again" and "possible cancer" were being tossed about. I took my Dad out for a bite to eat and let him know this keeping secrets stuff was unacceptable. That I wanted to help and would do whatever he needed, whenever he needed it. Little did I know that would become my life for the next 9 months.
I took care of my Dad through his illness. He wanted to be at home and other than a 2 week stint in the hospital after the chemo almost killed him, I managed to keep him home until the end. During the last 3 months we enlisted the help of one of his sisters and without her I would have never seen my own family during this time. Dad needed so much care, and after 6 months I was burnt out and in need of some help. My Aunt Cathie came to the rescue and stayed with him so I could do all the things that go along with cancer. Picking up medication, literature, food, spending lots of time on the phone arranging nurses to come in once a day to check on him, making arrangements for people to come in with air tanks, people with bars for the bathroom and stairs, people who could help bathe him so we didn't have to. We enlisted hospice to help and without them I would have been lost. They helped teach me what to expect as the days passed and time became short. Since I was his primary caregiver and dealt with all the meds I needed to learn how to give shots, how to properly dose morphine, all kinds of things I never in my life imagined I'd be doing. Yet it was my Dad so I just did it without question. It's what you do when someone you love is sick.
I won't lie to you, this journey with my Dad was hard on him, me and my family. He was harsh, and he took his anger out on the people around him. For some reason he seemed to pick on Mini-me when she came with me to the house. She is as stoic as my father and myself, but this man could reduce her to tears in moments. We all just tolerated it because he was sick, and who yells at someone who is terminally ill. He continued to lash out at us all and only in the final weeks did he finally admit it was because he was scared. We had a big blow up a couple of weeks before he passed away. I still am shocked I yelled at him that day but I had reached my limit. He really laid into my aunt this particular day and I just reached my boiling point. I told him it was unacceptable to treat her that way. He raged, and told me off. I shot back that he was lucky we were all there given how he was treating us. My aunt had dropped everything to come help, no questions asked. This was the wrong thing to say. It escalated into a war of words until I decided enough was enough and left for the day. He complained to my aunt and I was sure he hated me for telling him how I felt about what he was doing. The next day I went to the house as I always did, thinking he would not speak to me ever again. To my surprise he apologized to me. I think this was the only time in my life my Dad had ever apologized and admitted he was wrong. He told me he was scared to die. That he was in so much pain, and he didn't know how to cope. He told me how he felt for the first time in his life, we both cried and talked for what seemed like forever. Openly, kindly and uninhibited. He was so scared of what was coming but was trying to be strong for all of us. He did not realize he was hurting those who wanted to help. From that moment forth my Dad was kind to everyone who came to the house. In his final weeks he became forthcoming and talked about his feelings. It was a rare thing only a few of us were lucky enough to experience. Dad being vulnerable, something he had always perceived as weakness. It was like his final gift to us.
I feel so blessed to have gotten to know my Dad so well through this process. We spent 9 months together, day in and day out. You get to know someone pretty well through something like that. He told me stories about his childhood, his early years with my Mom, told memories of us kids and then memories of the grand-kids. I had the distinct pleasure of listening to him and getting to know him like I never had before. I can look back now and know that "caregiver syndrome" was the reason he was so mean to me all the time. It's hard on a person like my Dad to rely on someone else for everything in their life. He was so fiercely independent and then his life flipped upside down, and he had to rely on his daughter to do things for him he never imagined I would have to do. So he became bitter and resentful. Most people would. It took some counselling at the Cancer Clinic for me to really understand what was happening and why.
The best thing I took away from my counselling sessions was her telling me "it's his journey, you're just a passenger. He's the driver and he has to choose his own path. You're just along for the ride. You either accept his path or you get out of the car." This advice was life-changing for me. It made me step back and always see things from his perspective. Which made caring for him so much easier most days.
When I think back and remember my Dad lots of things come to mind. His weird sense of humour, how he always smelled of pipe tobacco, his flannel shirts (one of which I still own) and his love of food. Since I was the only lady in the house for most special occasions it seemed to fall to me to make most dinners. Dad loved my lasagna, apple pie, and black forest cake. He would ask me to make roast chicken, and my stuffing was something he practically begged for. There are so many recipes that remind me of my Dad. But ice cream, well, ice cream was his favourite.
Ice cream was something my Dad loved beyond belief. Not just a little bit. But a whole big bunch. He ate very healthy day to day, most of his meals being balanced and veggie heavy. He took really good care of himself, even as a bachelor in his later years. His one weakness was ice cream. He loved it. He could not resist it. We used to tease him about his ice cream belly. He was tall and thin, barring a little bump we dubbed his "ice cream belly". Dad would eat ice cream as much as possible. Yet he liked it simple. My Dad was not into fancy flavours or ice cream that was overloaded with extras. He liked it pure and simple. One of his favourite options was high quality vanilla ice cream that he would top with strawberry jam. He just loved it that way. Simple and classic.
So today I made you a creamy, simple vanilla bean ice cream with only 3 ingredients. I know right. Sounds too good to be true. But it's not. I am not someone who makes much home-made jam so I turned to a tried and true way to serve up strawberries in our family. Again, it's simple and classic. Only 3 ingredients, and quite honestly you could get away with 2 ingredients if you wanted to for this one. It's just a simple macerated berry recipe. It makes me super happy to share this recipe with you in honour of my Dad. He would have wanted a spoon for each hand for this one!
Vanilla Bean Ice Cream with Home-made Strawberry Topping & KitchenAid Stand Mixer Giveaway #recipesfromtheheart
Ingredients
For the Vanilla Bean Ice Cream:
- 3 cups heavy cream
- 2 vanilla beans
- 1 cup vanilla sugar regular sugar is okay too
For the Macerated Strawberries:
- 1 to 1 ½ cups fresh strawberries washed and hulled
- Juice of 1 orange
- 1 to 2 tablespoons vanilla sugar regular sugar is fine
Instructions
For the Vanilla Bean Ice Cream:
- Pour the heavy cream into a medium sized saucepan. Place over medium low heat.
- Take your vanilla beans and slice them down the middle all the way down the length. Spread it apart as best you can and scrape the inside with a knife. Take all that yummy goodness and put it in the saucepan of heavy cream. Repeat with second bean, and toss both the beans in the saucepan too.
- Now let the cream heat up until it starts to bubble all around the outside edge of the saucepan. Do not let it reach full boil. You just want that slight bubbling.
- Take it off the heat and drop in the sugar. Stir until it dissolves.
- Now allow it to cool down.
- Place in the fridge overnight, (you can do it for a shorter time but the vanilla taste will be more subtle) covered.
- Remove from the fridge and pull out the large pieces of beans.
- Pop in your ice cream maker and allow to spin for 10 to 15 minutes. This is a steeped cream base so it will not double up like some ice cream bases. It yields less but is far more creamy.
- Pop the ice cream attachment in the freezer overnight, you could do it for less time but it will not be as firm.
- Remove from freezer when ready to serve.
- Since this is a creamy base it tends to melt quicker so keep that in mind when scooping.
- Serve solo or with berries.
For the Strawberry Topping:
- Hull and slice up your strawberries into a medium sized bowl, or container.
- Cut an orange in half. Juice it over top of the strawberries. Discard the orange.
- Cover and place in the fridge for about 2 to 4 hours. The longer they sit the softer they become.
- Remove and sprinkle some sugar over top.
Putting it all together:
- Scoop out some ice cream, working quickly.
- Scoop some strawberries over top.
- You can top with anything else you like, I threw pistachios over top of mine, but you could use walnuts or almonds or chocolate pieces.
- Serve with a big old simple and classic smile! For Dad!
Notes
Nutrition
Make sure you stop by all my friends websites as they share stories, recipes and a cute knitting project with you! We have the pleasure of having a dear friend of mine named Amy with us for this event. She is the only non-food blogger participating today but she has such a personal story to tell about her dad's recent battle with cancer. So please welcome her along with all my foodie friends. Stop by and say hello to all these very special people:
Chili Verde by Juanita's Cocina
S'Mores Brownies in Jars by That Skinny Chick Can Bake
Dark Chocolate and Orange Muffins by The Dutch Baker's Daughter
Boston Cream Pie by Pass The Sushi
My Fathers Day Recipe Round Up by Curry and Comfort
Tropical Smoothie by Dinners, Dishes and Desserts
Mini Gugelhupf by Masala Herb
Sauteed Strawberry and Sugarsnap Salad by Cook The Story
Cranberry Cashew Breakfast Muffins by In Fine Balance
Arugula Salad with Sundried Tomatoes and Mushrooms by Crazy Foodie Stunts
Spicy Beef Sliders by Katie's Cucina
Thai Red Curry Soup by Damn Delicious
Suman (Sweet Rice and Banana Leaves) by Culinary Adventures with Camilla
Fresh Vegetable Salad by White Lights on Wednesday
Peanut Butter Cup Ice Cream Sundae by The Girl in the Little Red Kitchen
Cinnamon Chip Cookie Butter Bars by The Messy Baker
Berry/Cherry Fro-Yo Ice Cream by Cookistry
Honey Beer Bread by Hungry Couple
Cinnamon-Chocolate Chip Pancakes by The Spiffy Cookie
Chocolate Cherry Granola Bars by Sweet Remedy
Cookies and Cream Brownies by Cooking in Stilettos
Blueberry Lemon Cake by Roxana's Home Baking
Angel Cake by Ninja Baking
and
Knit (or crocheted) Grey Brain Cancer Mustache Pin by Knit, Purl, Damn!
Thank you to all the participants for their hard work and patience.
For all my readers, thanks for your patience over this very lengthy post. And for you constant support whether I share recipes or really personal stories with you. You always show me kindness and generosity, thank you for that. It means the world to me.
Now on with the giveaway!
Visit Facebook.com/
Disclaimer: We are proud to have KitchenAid on board to give away the grand prize for this event. No blogger involved received anything from KitchenAid or any compensation of any kind. It was our goal not to profit in any way since the focus is on raising money for charity. The bonus prizes are being supplied by me personally. It's my way to give back to my readers for their support and generosity. Thanks.
Toodles and smoochies! xx
Graham Doughty
Kim I would make ice cream fot the worlds best fieldberry milkshake!
Kim Beaulieu
Now that sounds awesome Uncle Graham. Good luck mister. I expect a milkshake if we ever make it out your way. I'd love to take a trip to Quebec next summer.
Melissa @ Served Up With Love
Anything and everything! Would love to win!
Kim Beaulieu
I like your style!
Colette @ JFF!
KimmyBee! You look like an angel in your wedding pic!
We're full-throttle for cancer support in my family.
Love this ice cream recipe, too. The stand mixer is perfect for adding extra hands when you're cooking/baking. Love it!
Kim Beaulieu
Thanks so much Colette. I still love that dress. It had the cutest little bolero jacket and then turned strapless when you took it off.
I love you and think you're awesome. Full throttle support is the only way to go.
I swear I need a second one. One just isn't enough any more. lol
Katie white
Sounds yummy! Can't wait to make it!
Kim Beaulieu
Let me know how it turns out.
Quincey S
I would make cookies first! Thanks for the awesome giveaway!
Kim Beaulieu
Love cookies. Good choice.
Haley
Wow, your story really got to me. You will never regret those 9 months you spent with your dad. I'm so glad in the final weeks his heart softened and you were able to show your love for each other. Thank you so much for sharing.
Kim Beaulieu
Thank you so much for visiting Haley. I feel compelled to share a couple of times of year to help others feel a little less alone. It's a hard thing to go through so it's nice to reach out and let people know we're there for them. xx
Daphne
I love reading your posts! Sometimes I find that even if my family can't express their feelings vocally, they manage express their love through food. I can appreciate everything you went through - thank you for sharing your story!
Kim Beaulieu
Thank you. Most are wildly funny then every now and then I have to change the tone. Always makes me nervous when I do that. But glad the response has been so wonderful. We never expressed emotion growing up. It's big a big hurdle for me in my adult life. Life's a journey, you just have to roll with it. Thanks so much for visiting. xx
Jonnie
I would make some banana loaf
Kim Beaulieu
One of my faves.
A Canadian Foodie
I Came back because it was a father's day post - and long... I didn't realize there was a give-a-way - or that it was about cancer. Mom had bowel cancer last August - diagnosed then, operated on October 12 - was 82 - never needed chemo or radiation. She is a miracle survivor. GOING strong like a 60 year old. Dad, however, had COPD. The stress caused 4 major exacerbations during that time and he almost died during 2 of them. I was in the hospital, almost non-stop for 4 months - don't know how you managed 9. My story has a happy ending. I cannot believe my dad survived. It is truly a miracle. He and I now go twice a week to the gym and a breath easy program at the hospital for lung health. I know all about therapy, and healing relationships, and the rough go you must have gone through. My heart is with you. Beautiful read. Sad, sad, story - but there was definitely that silver lining that you and dad resolved your relationship issues and actually bonded before his death. That has definitely happened here, too.
Big hug
Valerie
Kim Beaulieu
Thanks for coming back Valerie. Let me start by asking if you're okay? Are you safe in your area? My son had to be evac'd out late last night. Was a very long, stressful night. Let me know how you're doing.
Thanks for sharing your stories about you mom and dad. My aunt died of colon cancer years ago. It's a wicked disease, so glad your mom survived. That's just a miracle cuz bowel cancer is usually pretty lethal. She really is a miracle. That's amazing. And your dad, how inspirational is that. COPD is nothing to mess with and he just turned it around. I'm so impressed with his story. It's not an easy illness to cope with.
It's amazing what the body can do when pushed. I only took 1 day off in 9 months. And I never got sick, and existed most days on 2 to 4 hours sleep max, some days 1 or 2 if I was lucky. I look back and wonder how I managed but I think love just pulls you through. The Nike thing comes into play "just do it", and somehow you do. I crashed and burned after the fact. Slept like a baby for a few days.
I'm so glad I took care of him. And so glad I am able to tell the story and share it with others. It certainly changed my life. I've never been the same since. You just learn to get past so much of the nonsense in life when you see it from the cancer vantage point.
And again, I hope you and your family are safe and dry right now. Please stay safe! xx
A Canadian Foodie
oh - and what would I make? My mother's angel food cake, of course. My daughter has the ice cream maker and is crazy over it.
🙂
V
Kim Beaulieu
Ah sheer perfection. I love angel food cake. Ice cream makers are amazing.
dena
I would make challah.
Kim Beaulieu
That's perfect.
Soberjulie
I would get my friends together and make sorbets
Kim Beaulieu
That sounds amazing.
puja
chocolate lave cookies!!
Kim Beaulieu
Perfection!
Kate | Food Babbles
This post was so touching. I loved hearing about your father, your memories of him and seeing all these fantastic pictures. This recipe is fantastic also. Being a fellow ice cream lover, I know I'll be making this wonderfully simple recipe. Lovely!
Kim Beaulieu
Thanks so much Kate. It's always hard to share these stories but I am always amazed by the response. Makes my heart happy to hear other people share and open up. xx
Stephanie @ Eat. Drink. Love.
Kim, this is such a touching post and I'm so glad you shared it with us. This is such a wonderful cause. Oh, and the ice cream? Yeah, that's pretty fantastic too! 🙂
Kim Beaulieu
Thanks so much Stephanie. I'm so glad you visited. This stuff is hard to write but it feels amazing to have folks stop in and tell their own stories.
Tara
Thanks for sharing this post Kim, I know it was not an easy one to write. It is a wonderful cause!! Your ice cream looks amazing too!
Kim Beaulieu
Thanks so much Tara. Not easy but so worthwhile.
Baker Becky
Thank you for sharing your touching story with us, there is nothing more important than our families! <3
Kim Beaulieu
Thanks so much for visiting. And it's so true. My family is my biggest priority in my life. I'm nothing without them.
Wendy Wendy
took so much courage to share your story.
ice cream.... yummmm.
Kim Beaulieu
Thanks so much. It was so worthwhile though.
Thank you. Love ice cream.
Sadaf
You are a brave woman to go through the tough times during your dad's last days. May God bless you and him It's a great idea to host such a great giveaway in his memory.. I would make a fancy layer cake to celebrate if i win this mixer.
Kim Beaulieu
Thank you so much. I feel pretty not brave most days. But this was something worth doing for sure.
Layer cakes are amazing. I don't make them enough.
Jean | DelightfulRepast.com
Thank you for telling your story. I've been through the cancer journey with a few loved ones; unfortunately, I don't have time today to tell the stories. Perhaps another day. I know your post is going to help everyone who reads it. With my new mixer, I would make a Victoria sponge in honor of my mother who died of lung cancer; she was a fantastic cake baker.
Kim Beaulieu
Thanks so much Jean. I'm sorry for what you've been through. It's never easy to lose people we love.
I think Victoria Sponge Cake sounds divine.